Is the Mohawk Making a Come Back???

Single mom here, checking in again.

Last night when Tyler’s dad and grandmom brought him home and Tyler took off his hat, I immediately noticed that he had a new hair cut.  Okaay.  I wanted to be appreciative that his dad took that initiative although I had just cut his hair a few days ago.  I was trying really hard to like it.  At first I thought it was a ‘fade’ gone wrong.  The fade line was waaay to high.  Then, after watching the kid in action for a few minutes and getting to see the back of his head I couldn’t help but to ask, “is that a mohawk????”  Tyler’s grandmom chimed in, you haven’t seen all the kids wearing their hair like that – it’s the new style.  Tyler goes to a huge 600 kid preschool.  I see hundreds of kids reg-u-lar-ly! Without needing to think about it for even a second, I responded “N0000…  it’s a mohawk, right?”  The reason I even asked was because it’s not your normal Mr. T type mohawk.  It starts wider in the front and tapers down to a point in the back.  They responded yes, it’s a mohawk.  Tyler’s grandmom said, “she doesn’t like it”.  My only comment was, “good they took pictures last week”, as I thought about how long it would take to be able to change it back to a normal style.  After a little more thought, once again I was just compelled to ask, “are you thinking that the top should grow out and the sides stay short like that or is it supposed to always be short like that?”  His dad just kinda shrugged his shoulders.  I left it alone after that because I had already determined that it would only take two weeks for it to look normal again!  AND, thank God Tyler likes to wear a hat every day!

Now there is a good part to my three, almost four year old having a mohawk.  I had a job interview today.  There were four people in the room.  Three of the four took turns asking me questions from a sheet of paper they all had a copy of.  The second question was to tell them something about myself that they wouldn’t know based on my application or resume.  I thought about it for a few seconds then told them that I have the most wonderful three, almost four year old son. I went on to tell them that his dad brought him home last night with this mohawk.  They all laughed pretty good at my rendition of this story that ended with, so yes, I have a three, almost four year old with a mohawk.  After first being shocked beyond words that he’d even cut his hair into a style he knew I wouldn’t like, I am now find some humor in it. 

Just in case there were more instances of mohawks popping up at the school, today when I went to pick up Tyler I had a light conversation with the teachers about Tyler’s new do.  They both agreed that there is maybe two other kids with mohawks in the school.  One of the two wears his with lots of gel to make it stand up in spiky pieces.  I knew I was right.  Now, all I need is for Tyler to love it and never stop wanting to “rock a ‘hawk … kinda like people who still wear mullets!  lol. 

The new cut has turned into comic relief!

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Child Support Court

Single Mom here, checking in again. 

It’s now 2:08am and I am still awake watching TV and playing a game of Texas Hold ’em Poker on my cell phone.  I am not always totally in touch with my feelings.  Often times I need to take some time to digest what happened, then analyze what I’m feeling. 

Yesterday, Tyler’s father and I were scheduled to appear in Family Court a.k.a. Child Support Court for an enforcement hearing.  I was there but he didn’t bother to show up.  That has been the story of Tyler’s life…. I’m there and his father is not.  The only thing that I can say to the man’s credit is that, after being totally absent since Tyler’s 2nd birthday, he called and has been seeing Tyler since some time in September.  Either two or three times Tyler has spent the night with him.   One night, not the weekend.  Really sad to have to say that he lives with his mom. 

Without delving too deep into all the things that has pissed me off about that man, elaborating more about all the crappy details of his life, explaining how having such a loser as my sons’ father is, citing the billions of incidents where Tyler and I would be better off if his father did help financially, that he did have a job when I dated him, or exactly how I feel now,  I somehow think that you know just what I mean. 

Other single parents with absent co-parents personally know all the issues we handle alone, least of all the issue of balancing time and money.  Single parents with a co-parent and couples personally feel some of it, but, I am sure that since you know all the things a parent is responsible for, you can imagine if the burden rested solely on your shoulders.  My child is not a burden but worrying about finding a job to make enough money to support us because I probably won’t ever have reliable help,  school clothes, winter coat, boots, a roof over our head, food on the table, keeping the house clean, clothes washed, cable, telephone, gas, electric, a vehicle maintained in good condition, auto insurance, extra curricular activities, stressing education… all of those things add a huge weight to my shoulders.  The weight is so much heavier than when I was single because now my sons’ life depends on it. 

Tuesday night when we were doing our normal routine of reading books before bedtime, Tyler said the most amazingly intuitive thing.  He’s only three but he understands on his level.  At the last pages of the book Goldilocks and the Three Bears where it says that Goldilocks was so scared she ran all the way home, it shows the three bears standing in the living room by their front door.  Flanking the door are family pictures.  Tyler likes to say who is in each picture.  He says that he is Baby Bear.  Of course I am Mama Bear.  But Tuesday night, my intuitive little three year old pointed to Mama Bear and said that’s you, then pointed to Papa bear and told me that was me too. 

in·tu·i·tive  /ɪnˈtuɪtɪv, -ˈtyu-/    [in-too-i-tiv, –tyoo–]   –adjective

1. perceiving by intuition, as a person or the mind.

2. perceived by, resulting from, or involving intuition: intuitive knowledge.

3. having or possessing intuition: an intuitive person.

4. capable of being perceived or known by intuition.

 

in·tu·i·tion  /ˌɪntuˈɪʃən, -tyu-/ [in-too-ish–uhn, -tyoo-]    noun

1.  direct perception of truth, fact, etc., independent of any reasoning process; immediate apprehension.

2.  a fact, truth, etc., perceived in this way.

3.  a keen and quick insight.

4.  the quality or ability of having such direct perception or quick insight.

5. Philosophy .

a. an immediate cognition of an object not inferred or determined by a previous cognition of the same object.

b. any object or truth so discerned.

c. pure, untaught, noninferential knowledge.

6. Linguistics . the ability of the native speaker to make linguistic judgments, as of the grammaticality, ambiguity, equivalence, or nonequivalence of sentences, deriving from the speaker’s native-language competence.

 

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